Heartbeats
by xRainxFallxDownx
Summary: AU Harry/Ginny. Ginny Weasley has been alone for the last three years, raising her child. Suddenly, Harry makes his return, determined to be a part of his child's life. HG, some RHr.
1. Chapter 1

**I've written about seven chapters of this so far, and I wasn't planning on posting it until I finished it, but here it is. I figured I would see if anyone was even interested before I finished it. So, this is an AU Harry/Ginny story. Here is a rough timeline: **

**-A week after the Final Battle, Harry and Ginny reunite**

**-He leaves the next morning**

**-This story begins three years later. **

**Please review and let me know what you think! But please, only constructive criticism if you really dislike it. **

As nineteen year old Ginny Weasley arrived at work on Monday morning, she couldn't help but ponder on what used to be her dream. Her dream of playing professional Quidditch. Or perhaps becoming an Auror. Instead, here she was, at the day care center for young witches and wizards she had opened with her mother. The Little Cauldron was her pride and joy, despite being a fall back when her entire life had been turned upside down.

She had never imagined that one night of passion after the war had ended would lead her here. In fact, Ginny Weasley had been frivolous enough to believe that that night of passion was the beginning of forever with the emerald eyed hero of the wizarding world. She was deeply mistaken. She had rolled over to find him gone with a note on the pillow.

_Ginny-_

_I seem to always be doing you wrong. Last night was another instance of that. I do love you, Ginny, you must know that and believe that. But I cannot stay here. After everything, after the hell of this battle, I need to leave. I need to leave the guilt and the past behind, every bit of it, and as much as it kills me, you are a part of that past. I will always love you. _

_-Harry _

She almost snorted derisively just thinking of it. She had sobbed for weeks. That is, until she realized how many weeks it had been, and how she had missed a monthly occurence quite a while ago. Shaking and clutching Hermione desperately, she brewed the potion that would seal her fate. When the cauldron glowed gold, she knew; her life had changed forever that night. It had been the beginning of forever. It had been the beginning of loving another person for the rest of her life. It just hadn't been the person she had expected.

As Ginny pondered this, she looked down at the little black haired boy beside her. He blinked up at her with the same emerald eyes that belonged to his father and his grandmother. She grinned at him as he clutched her skirt, looking quite terrified.

"It's all right, baby," she said, lifting him up. "Mama will be here all day. This is where Mama works, and now you'll be with me all day long!"

He blinked his beautiful eyes at her, shaped, at the very least, like her own. The dimples when he grinned at her also belonged to her. "Ma?"

"Yes, my boy, Ma."

"There you are, Ginny dear," Molly Weasley said, bustling from the office. "And there is my beautiful sweet boy, oh come right here to grandmum!"

Immediately, the small boy giggled with happiness, reaching his pudgy arms for his grandmother. "I see how it is, you traitor," Ginny teased as she handed him over. "I see none of the other kids are here quite yet."

"No," Molly said, "not for another half hour. I wanted to go over the snack with you."

And with that, the day began. It was not until nearly ten hours later that Ginny arrived back home at her small flat. It was a tiny two bedroom thing, but Ginny had insisted on moving out when James turned one. She and her mother had established The Little Cauldron while she was pregnant, and business had been quite successful. She had saved up enough for this place, and she was proud to be standing on her own two feet with her two year old little boy.

When she arrived home, she was unsurprised to see Hermione in her kitchen, heating up some pasta. Tea was floating over the table.

"There you are, Ginny. Hello James! Aren't you just getting bigger every time I see you!"

"Tell me about it," Ginny groaned, sitting him down on the floor, where he instantly crawled to his toys on the floor. "You know, you don't need to cook for me all the time."

"I'm aware," Hermione said. "But I like to help out, Ginny, you know that. Ron should be here soon."

Ginny collapsed in a chair at the table. "Thank God, he'll keep Jay entertained for a while."

Hermione laughed. "He does adore his uncle, doesn't he?"

"Merlin knows why," Ginny teased. "Can't believe he's almost two already."

"Are you going to send photos again?" Hermione asked tentatively. Ginny had sent out an owl to Harry with a photo of James when he was born and another when he turned one, but she never received a response of any kind. She was never certain if he even received them; however, Hermione's owl Artemis always returned with no photos tied on its leg.

"Yes," Ginny sighed. "I at least like to know that I've put in the effort, you know? If he doesn't want to come home for him, then that's just fine. But when James grows up, I want him to know that I put in the best effort I could to give him both parents."

"You are an amazing mother, Ginny," Hermione said, her tone rather fierce. "Don't you ever forget that."

"Thank you, Hermione," Ginny said with a small, tired smile. Ginny had changed with motherhood. Her hair was even longer than before, as she hardly had the time to cut the red waves that nearly reached her bellybutton. She had taken to wearing long skirts, almost like her mother's, although she would never admit that. She couldn't imagine the last time she had tried to look appealing, although Hermione constantly reassured her that she was just as beautiful as she was at sixteen.

Ron apparated into the flat with a growl, dropping immediately to the floor to play with James, who shrieked with delight as he tottered to his uncle. "There is my favorite nephew! Rawr!" Ron growled, always playing the loyal part of the angry dragon.

"You're the first dragon I've ever heard say 'rawr', you know," Hermione teased her fiance, who righted himself, hoisting James onto his hip.

"Hello to you too, love," he said, kissing her on the cheek. He ruffled Ginny's hair. "Hey Gin."

"'Lo Ron," she replied. "We were just discussing sending pictures after his second birthday."

"Not that he deserves it, but I don't see an issue with it. As long as you don't expect him to come home."

"You know that I don't, Ron," Ginny said seriously. He nodded.

"What would you do, Ginny? If he did come home," Hermione said suddenly. Ginny's brown eyes widened for a moment.

"You know, I'm not sure. I would never want to deprive him of the possibility to know his father, but I couldn't trust that he wouldn't run again and break his heart. For now, James doesn't know what he's missing, you know?"

"It'd be hard," Hermione agreed. "I've just always wondered, because in this lifetime there is always a chance of him returning, isn't there?"

"I suppose so," Ginny sighed.

"He'd be in for the duel of his life, I'll tell you that," Ron said, bouncing his nephew, who giggled. "You-Know-Who will seem like a puppy compared to us Weasleys."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Oh yes, Ronald, you are quite terrifying as you snuggle that baby."

Ron spluttered indignantly. "Just because I love my nephew does not make me any less manly!"

"I know, dear," Hermione said, kissing his cheek and then the top of James's head.

Ginny looked on with a contented grin as Hermione proceeded to put dinner on the table and Ron placed her son in the highchair next to the small wooden table. Sure, she was living a life she had hardly imagined for herself. And bloody hell, was it hard. But despite the fact that she might not have a boyfriend, and her son might not have a father in his life, they were not without family. Ron and Hermione loved their godson James more than life itself, and all of Ginny's brothers consistently offered her help and support. Ginny found herself not wanting for anything as she ate a good meal with her family that night, content with her situation.

After dinner, Ginny put James down in his crib and said goodbye to Ron and Hermione, who were only going up a couple of floors to their own flat in the building. Ginny closed the door and began to clean up James's toys. After the flat was relatively clean, or as clean as it could be with a two year old inhabiting it, Ginny finally went into her small bathroom to shower. She let the hot water roll over her skin and sighed contentedly. Her showers were the one time she had nothing to worry about; James was asleep, work was not for another ten hours, and there was no one else to worry about. Just as Ginny reveled in this fact, her son let out a screech from his bedroom. Ginny sighed, rolling her eyes slightly as she turned off the faucet and dried herself off before throwing on her yellow satin robe and entering her son's room.

"It's all right my love," Ginny soothed, rocking him in her arms. "What's wrong my boy?"

"Ma," he whimpered. "Ma, scared!"

"Oh baby love, what are you frightened of?" Ginny cooed softly. "Would you like me to sing you a song?"

He whimpered with a small nod, and so Ginny began to sing to him in her breathy voice. "Stars shining bright above you, night breezes seem to whisper I love you, but in your dreams whatever they be, dream a little dream of me..."

She continued her song until his green eyes fluttered shut and she sighed, laying him gently back down in his crib before turning out the light and walking across the hall to her own room. She never closed either of their doors. Even in the present peace time, the paranoia of danger had not left her system.

A rap on her door just as she was about to change into her pajamas caused her to huff in annoyance. She went to the living room and called softly through the door.

"Who's there?"

There was silence. Ginny began to feel nervous. "Hello?"

"Ginny," a deep, evidently nervous voice called through the door. "It's me."

Ginny felt weak in the knees. Her limbs were numb. It could not be.

"You'll need to clarify that," she half-whispered. She was surprised he heard her.

"It's me, Harry."


	2. Chapter 2

There were many things in life that Harry Potter wasn't proud of. There were many mistakes he wished he could fix and take back. However, as he began to unpack his things in his new flat, he knew that his greatest mistake, his greatest error, had been leaving Ginny that night; even more so, an even greater mistake had not been returning upon receiving a letter with a picture of a tiny baby boy who undoubtedly belonged to he and Ginny.

Harry sighed, standing up and crossing to his kitchen, pouring himself a cup of coffee. It had been a long three years, he decided. After he had left the Burrow, he had gone to Italy, where he applied for their Auror department under a fake name. Using glamour spells each morning, he had created a brown haired, blue eyed version of himself named Chris Thompson. He then spent three years learning everything there was to know about defense, embarking on dangerous missions to round up the last of the Italian dark wizards. He would return to an empty flat there and brood, thinking about the girl, and the child, that he had left behind. Harry now sat at his table and remembered every gloriously painful detail of the night he left.

_The Burrow was empty, save the two of them. The elder Weasleys had gone to a mortuary to plan Fred's funeral; Ron was with Hermione in Australia, retrieving her parents. Harry sat in Ron's room, anxiously pondering if now was the ideal time to discuss with Ginny their relationship status. Suddenly set that it must be tonight, Harry set his jaw and walked down to the landing in front of Ginny's door. He rapped on it nervously, and she opened her door with a small smile. It was nearing night now, but he knew that her family wouldn't be home for several hours yet. _

"_Ginny," he began, and he was surprised to find his voice cracking slightly. His nerves were getting the best of him. He didn't deserve her back, not after the way he had heard her scream when she believed him to be dead. _

"_Hello, Harry," she said, and her voice and countenance were soft, nothing like he expected. She took his hand gently and pulled him into her room, closing the door behind her. She sat on her bed and he nervously sat beside her, his knee bouncing up and down with anxiety. _

"_Ginny, I...I don't know where to begin. This last year, I can't even explain to you how much I've missed you. I watched your dot on the Marauders Map every night, praying you were safe. And when I heard about the situation at Hogwarts, I was so scared for you-" _

_Ginny suddenly grinned. "Taught those Death Eaters a lesson, we did." _

"_It was dangerous for you to do that," Harry protested weakly. "But I didn't expect any less from you." _

_Ginny smiled at him and brought her hand to his cheek. "I missed you too, Harry. And although you drove me insane with worry, I do understand why you did what you did, I understand why you had to leave and why I couldn't know where you were going." _

_Harry stared at her, surprised by her understanding before shaking himself. Of course she understood. Despite her temper and inherent recklessness, Ginny had always been patient with him, always. "I love you, Ginny," he whispered, bringing his hand to hold hers. "I love you so much, and I've never said those words to anyone in my life-" _

_"I love you too, Harry," she said, cutting him off. She was beaming at him, and the warmth that filled him at those words was indescribable. Before he could stop himself, he had grabbed her in his arms, engaging her in a searing kiss. He pressed her against the bed softly, nibbling on her lip, reveling in the sound she made when he did. He made his way to her neck, placing feather light kisses on spots he knew would cause her to shiver. He felt her hands on his back, trying to lift his shirt off. He helped her, pulling it off before lowering himself to her once again. _

_It was only minutes before they were both panting, trembling, finally feeling what it could have been like if the war had never gotten between them. Now, there was nothing between them but undergarments. Harry rolled slightly off of her to lay beside her, feeling every part of her as he kissed her slowly, deeply. _

"_Ginny," he breathed. "I love you." _

"_I love you too," she whispered back, running her hands over his chest. "Let me show you how much." _

_Harry blinked, suddenly realizing their situation. "Gin, are you sure? We don't have to, I don't expect that from you at all-" _

_Ginny cut him off with another searing kiss, nodding into his mouth as she tugged at his boxers. _

_Half an hour later, she lay in his arms under her sheets as he played with her red hair, seemingly mesmerized by the strands. _

"_That was the most amazing thing I've ever experienced," Harry murmured into her hair. "You're amazing. And so beautiful, Ginny. I've got the be the luckiest man alive." _

_Ginny giggled and nuzzled into him. "On the contrary, Mr. Potter, I'm the luckiest girl." _

_Harry shook his head quite quickly. "No, no. I am far luckier." He dropped a tender kiss to her forehead and heaved a contented sigh. "I'm head over heels in love with you, Ginny, and I always will be. I want to marry you one day, Gin, and have a bunch of kids, boys who look like me and girls who look and act just like you. We'll have a little house-" _

"_What color is the door?" Ginny mumbled sleepily into his chest. He grinned. _

"_Red, of course," he said. "I promise to give you all of those things now." Ginny nodded and he smiled down at her. He couldn't keep the smile off of his face. There could not be a happier person on the earth than himself in this moment, he decided. He had made love to the most stunning girl he'd ever known after a year of being apart, after war had almost damaged his chances. _

_Ginny was asleep now, and suddenly, it came flooding back to him. This felt like someone else's life once again, and it dawned on him that he could not, ever, have this. Not when hundreds had died for him, not when he was responsible for so much death and destruction. His green eyes burned with tears as he looked at Ginny's sleeping face, so lovely and peaceful and blissfully unaware of his thoughts. He lay beside her for another hour before tearing himself away from her, painfully, and getting dressed. He scrawled a letter to her through his tears, keeping his sobs as quiet as he could. He placed it on the pillow where his head had been, leaning down to kiss her on the forehead, on both cheeks, slowly and gently on her lips. _

"_Ginny," he whispered, brokenly, "I love you. I will always love you more than anything in this world. Please forgive me one day." _

_He went up to Ron's room and packed his belongings before dissappearing with a pop. _

Harry's eyes still burned just thinking about it, just picturing how she must have awoken, sleepily reaching for him only to find a piece of parchment on a cold pillow where he should have been. He resisted the urge to slam his fist on the table before standing up, running his hands through his hair. She liked it best this length, he remembered. She hated it short and hated it too long.

He was home now, he had returned. He had returned to know his son. He would not even entertain the idea of somehow returning to his place in Ginny's life. He would never lay beside her again, kiss her soft lips, run his hands through her hair. He had done too much, he had hurt her too badly now to ever return to what they had and he knew that, accepted it grudgingly years ago. However, he knew his Ginny; she would never keep him from his son. She would want James to know his father now, even after years of absence. He wondered what she looked like now, if she had changed.

Steeling his resolve, Harry looked down at the sheet of paper where he had written her address when he looked her up weeks ago. He left his flat, his heart pounding in his throat.


	3. Chapter 3

Ginny shakily opened the door a crack. Low and behold, there he was, a few inches taller than before. His hair was shaggy, the way she always liked it, and there was a five o'clock shadow on his jaw. His green eyes were still behind the same glasses he had always worn. Ginny slowly opened the door, unsure of what her reaction was meant to be.

"What are you...I mean, how are you...come in," Ginny said, backing into her flat and locking the door as he nervously stepped in. His eyes were glued to the floor. Ginny crossed her arms over her yellow robe. It suddenly occurred to her how skimpy it was, standing here in front of Harry for the first time in nearly three years.

"I know it's rather late, I'm sorry," Harry mumbled.

"It's only nine," she said, fighting to keep her tone steady. "Unless you mean that it's a little late to return after three years, in which case yes, Harry, it is rather late."

"Ginny-"

"I am keeping my voice quiet for my son and only for my son," she said, but the fire in her voice was evident despite her low volume. When he did not seem surprised she let out a humorless laugh. "I assume you received my owls then."

"Yes," Harry breathed. "He's...he's beautiful, Ginny."

"Yes, he is," Ginny said. "He is my gorgeous baby boy. His name is James."

"James?" Harry croaked, finally looking at her. Ginny had always imagined it being difficult to look into his eyes, but after two years of seeing them on her son's face, they did not startle her.

"Yes, James Sirius Potter."

"You-you gave him my last name," Harry murmured.

"Yes, I did, more than you deserved I'm afraid. But I think he deserved to at least have something of his father."

Just then, James began to cry again.

"What has gotten into him tonight, he never does this," Ginny said worriedly as she rushed to his room. Harry stood in the living room, unsure of what to do. His hands were thrust into his pockets as he glanced at the toys on the floor and the pictures on the walls. Ginny returned into the hallway, clutching the small boy to her chest. Harry felt his mouth go dry as he stared at his son. He couldn't see his face, but he could see the black hair as Ginny held him. Ginny bounced back into his room and Harry was once again left alone in the living room.

He greedily took in all of the pictures, of Ron, Hermione, George, all of the Weasleys, and particularly his son. There was a photo of he and Ginny by the pond at the Burrow. She was wearing a jade green bikini, looking much like a 60's pinup minus the small baby in her lap, who wore her floppy sunhat. He was giggling, as was she. Harry smiled at the photo. They looked beautiful. Their happiness was radiating through the moving photograph.

"He was about eight months then," Ginny said suddenly from behind him. He jumped.

"I know I don't deserve to be here, Ginny," Harry began.

"That's right, you don't."

"I should go."

"Going to run again, are you, Harry?" Ginny snapped, her hands on her small hips.

"No," Harry said hurriedly. "I just. You don't want me here."

"Of course I do," Ginny said tiredly. "I wanted you here three years ago, when I was scared and pregnant and _sixteen." _

"I know. I should have been here. But I couldn't handle it, Ginny. I needed to escape what I had done, all of the people who had died because of me, all of the death and destruction I had caused."

"Yes, well, you caused even more destruction when you left," Ginny said softly. He drank in her appearance. She was even more beautiful than he remembered. "You broke my heart, Harry. I was alone, with a life growing inside of me. I never finished school. I opened up a day care with Mum. And I've raised my son the best that I can."

Hearing her call James hers, not theirs, sent a jolt of pain through Harry's heart. "I know, Ginny. I'm sure you've done a remarkable job with him."

"He's my world," Ginny said plainly. "So what, Harry? You want to be a part of that world, suddenly?"

"I've come home to make it right," he said, his voice still at nearly a whisper but suddenly fierce. "I want to make it right, Ginny."

Ginny shook her head. "It is too late for that, Harry." Her eyes were filling with tears, and she made no effort to hide them.

"Ginny, please," Harry pleaded. "I am here to stay. I've rented a flat just a couple of blocks away. I've transferred to the law enforcement division at this Ministry, Ginny, I'm coming back for good and I've got to be a part of his life, I've got to be."

Ginny blinked back her tears before replying. "I've been all he's had, Harry, and I cannot run the risk of you leaving him in weeks, or months, or a few years. I cannot. I will do anything to protect that little heart of his."

"I will not leave, Ginny. Let me prove that to you."

Ginny heaved a long suffering sigh, the kind of a sigh that a nineteen year old should not know how to heave. Harry was struck by this for a moment. Ginny seemed so much older than her age, he realized. "Only time can prove that, Harry."

"Will you let me meet him properly?" Harry asked. Tears were now in his own eyes. "I never had parents, Ginny. And it kills me to know he only has one."

Ginny's eyes narrowed. "I have been more than enough for him."

Harry hastily shook his head. "That's not what I meant, Ginny, I'm sure you have given him all the love in the world."

"I have," Ginny said firmly. "As have Ron, and Hermione. He has plenty of male figures in his life."

"Do you...are you seeing someone?" he asked tentatively. He wasn't sure he could bear the thought of the son he hadn't even met calling someone else "dad".

"No," Ginny said. "Not that it's any of your business, but I haven't dated at all since you."

Harry swallowed and nodded, feeling the sting of realizing it was really not his business.

"Ginny, I want you to know. I've thought of you every single day for the last three years. Truly, Ginny, I have. And there hasn't been anyone else. I couldn't...I couldn't ever. Especially after I got those first pictures of James, and I..." he broke off, his throat closing with tears. Tears were flowing down Ginny's cheeks, but she was trying to seem unaffected.

"I don't care who you were with or who you weren't with," Ginny said, and her tone was cold and empty. "Because you weren't here, you weren't where you had promised you would be. When you left, you proved to me that that night meant nothing to you."

Harry suddenly looked angry for the first time in this conversation, his face finally taking on an expression other than guilt and fear. "That night meant everything to me, don't you dare pretend that it didn't, Ginny. I told you so."

"Oh really?" Ginny said, and she laughed humorlessly. "Sure, you held me and told me you loved me and that this was the beginning of those ages we could have had. Sure! You told me all of that! But all of that flew out the window when I woke up alone, Harry."

"That night kept me from doing unthinkable things after the war," Harry said, swallowing his tears. "That night was all I had to keep me going because it made me believe that love really does exist."

"That night made me believe that it didn't," Ginny said softly. And suddenly Harry saw it, all of the hurt he had caused her, how the last three years had taken their toll on her. Her brown eyes were broken, tears streaming down her pale face, and he knew that he had done that to her. He had made her so broken and sad, and he knew that she had kept a strong mask for her son, for their son, while he had been off in Italy, working himself into the ground in their Auror training.

"Ginny-" he whispered, and his voice was audibly pained. "I...I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't have done this to you, I shouldn't have come back after all of this time, I had no right."

And suddenly he was sobbing, falling to his knees in her living room. When Ginny Weasley had started her day, it was just another average day in her life. She worked at the day care as usual. She ate dinner with her brother and her future sister in law, and she put her son to bed. But suddenly, here she was, standing in nothing but her satin robe, watching the father of her child and who she had once considered to be her whole future, crumble to the floor in guilt and obvious pain. She thought back to what she and Hermione had briefly discussed over dinner. This was the moment. She had read once that humans and animals were equipped with two responses: fight and flight. She could fight this, she could try her hardest to make this work in some twisted way, or she could run from it.

Fight or flight?

Ginny ran a hand over her face, wiping the wetness from it, and she forced her mask of strength back over her face. She would do it, for her son. For the fact that he was only two years old, and he had yet to understand what he was missing. She could, perhaps, save him from ever knowing the pain of watching his little friends play with their fathers, of wondering why he didn't have one. And selfishly, she wanted to save herself the pain of explaining to him that his father had left.

"You should know him," Ginny said, and her voice was shaking. He looked up at her, still crying, "and he should know you. This is going to be hard on me, Harry, I want you to realize that. But there isn't a thing in the world that I wouldn't do for my James, and if that means pushing aside all of the abandonment and hurt that you put me through to benefit him, then so be it, I will."

Harry shakily began to stand, still hiccuping. "Ginny, thank you. That's all I want, I just want to know him."

Ginny nodded, firmly. "Go home, Harry. Sleep this off and come back here tomorrow night for dinner if you want to meet your son."

Harry nodded, his jaw set. "I'll see you tomorrow night then, Ginny. Thank you."

He stood for a moment, looking unsure of what to do, before turning and walking out the door of her flat. Ginny stared at the closed door after his departure, simply staring, before slowly walking back to her bedroom, set on crying herself to sleep once more.


	4. Chapter 4

It was five o'clock when Ginny arrived home and asked Ron and Hermione to meet her for an hour before dinner. The couple arrived within ten minutes of her request and sat on her couch, watching her as she paced around on the floor, dodging James's toys as he played in the corner with his Quidditch set.

"You know how we were discussing last night, what I would do if Harry ever came back?" Ginny asked them suddenly. They both nodded and she continued. "Well, funny story. He came back. Last night. He came to the flat."

"That bloody-" Ron stood, outraged, his ears already red. Ginny hushed him.

"I never knew what I would do, I really didn't. And I didn't know until he and I had talked for some time. I've got to let him know James," Ginny said, and her shoulders slumped. Ron could see how hard this was on his baby sister, seeing the man who had broken her heart. Hermione stood up and wrapped her in a hug.

"You are the strongest, bravest woman I know," Hermione said, holding onto her future sister in law. "It's more than he deserves, but James does deserve to know his father."

Ron sighed. "For Jay, I say it's all right. D'you want us to be there next time you see him, Ginny? I'll try to be as civil as possible, I really will."

Ginny shook her head with a smile. "No, Ron. I think...I think it needs to be just us and James. I just wanted to tell you two what was happening. He'll be here in an hour for dinner."

"You know we're just a floo away," Ron said as he went to his nephew, picking him up and squeezing him. "And don't let him replace your uncle Ron, all right?"

"Ronnie!" James squealed, grabbing at his face.

Ron chuckled. "That's my boy."

Ron, Hermione, and Ginny discussed the situation further for another fifteen minutes before Ginny began to cook dinner. She put a shield around the boiling pots to prevent James from burning himself before shuffling into her room to change.

It was silly, she thought, to care what he thought of her appearance, but Ginny couldn't help but want to look nice. _Eat your heart out, Harry, _she thought to herself as she slipped on her favorite white dress, which was quite short and quite form fitting on top, flaring out at the hips. It was covered in red roses, the flower he had always said reminded him of her, and she sighed as she did a quick shine charm on her hair. She left her feet bare as she walked back into the kitchen, plating the food just as there was a knock on the door. Her hands instantly began to shake as she ran a hand over her dress and looked at her son, innocently playing with his dragon plushie.

"Here it goes, my love," she said, kissing him on the forehead. "Just remember that you love me, okay?"

He looked up at her with oblivious green eyes and tugged her hair with a giggle. She smiled and walked to the door, taking in a deep breath as she opened it. He stood there, in a black jumper and jeans, looking as though he had tried unsuccessfully to flatten his hair. In his hands he held a small black teddy bear, and Ginny tried her hardest to not smile at the sight.

"Hello, Harry," she said, stepping back to let him come into the flat. "Dinner is on the table, but it's got a heating charm on it if you'd like to see James first."

He nodded wordlessly and she lead him over to James, sitting on the floor beside her son. Harry stood nervously a few feet away.

"He doesn't bite, Harry," Ginny laughed. "Well, unless he's cutting teeth."

Harry sat tentatively next to the small boy and had to fight to keep the tears from his eyes. James was beautiful, an exact combination of himself and the woman next to him, the woman he had loved so much. This was evidence of that love, sitting and giggling and reaching for the bear in Harry's hands.

"Here you are," Harry said, handing him the stuffed bear. James seemed to like it, smushing it in his pudgy little arms. He smiled at Harry and reached out a chubby hand to him, grabbing onto his hand.

"He likes you," he heard Ginny murmur faintly next to him. She looked quite drawn all of a sudden, and she stood, walking into the kitchen, mumbling something about place settings.

Harry watched his son's green eyes as they followed his mother. He stood up and toddled after her.

"Ma?" he asked. "Dinner time?"

Ginny turned back and beamed at her son, standing equidistant between herself and Harry. "Yes, my love, dinner time. Come here so mama can get you all set up."

Harry's heart nearly stopped at the first sound of his son's voice. He was easily the most beautiful thing Harry had ever seen. As he sat down at Ginny's table for dinner, he couldn't stop watching him.

"He's going to think there's something wrong with his face," Ginny commented as she took a bite. Harry shook himself.

"Sorry."

"You can look at him all you want, Harry," Ginny said with a shrug. It made her happy, actually, to see the love shine through Harry's eyes as he stared, awestruck, at their son. "He's yours, too."

"Yeah," Harry breathed. "I suppose he is."

"Mama!" James suddenly called. "Ronnie? Where Ronnie?"

"You'll see Ronnie again tomorrow, sweet love," she assured James, ruffling his hair. She explained to Harry, "He adores Ron. Who knew that he'd ever be good with children."

Harry noticeably blanched. "Ron. I um, I assume that he loathes me."

Ginny sighed, contemplating softening the blow before shaking herself. She owed him nothing. She needn't spare him any hurt. He had caused it for himself. "You could say that, I suppose. I talked to him today, though, and he promised to try to remain as civil as possible, for the sake of James."

Harry nodded, and she could tell that this news had saddened him. She couldn't help but feel an urge to comfort him. She chalked it up to maternal instinct, seeing as Harry looked so much like a lost child as he watched James messily shovel bananas into his mouth.

"You get that from your uncle," Harry said, making a strained attempt at a joke. Ginny laughed lightly.

"That he does. He gets his brooding from you though," Ginny pointed out as she watched her son eat, oblivious to the tension at the table. Oblivious that he was meeting his father for the first time. "Sometimes he'll sit and make the same squinty face you have when you're brooding."

"Really?" Harry grinned. "That smile is all you, though."

"Yeah," Ginny said with a loving smile. "He's got some me in him, too. He's got quite the temper, this one. He gets quite angry if someone else is occupying my time, or Ron's, or Hermione's. When my mum let him eat some Treacle Tart...that was all you," Ginny said with a small laugh at the memory. "It's his favorite when I let him have some."

"It's quite good, isn't it?" Harry asked James, reaching out to ruffle his soft black hair. Ginny sat back and watched the exchange as James babbled at Harry, nonsense words that didn't quite make sense. He reached for his glasses, which Harry let him pull off of his face with a chuckle.

This is how it should have been, she thought, for the last three years. They should be sitting down to dinner together every night, laughing about how similiar James was to both of them. She should watch James and his father smile and laugh at one another every single night, but instead, this was the first time. And she tried her hardest to press down the feeling that it was just too late for him to suddenly share this with her precious son.

"Should we work out some kind of schedule then?" Ginny asked. "For when you'll come by and see him?"

Harry looked surprised but nodded. "You can pick how often and at what time."

Ginny nodded, satisfied that he was giving her the control in this situation. She needed that, and as much as it sort of bothered her that he still knew her well enough to know that, she appreciated the gesture. "I was thinking you could come over Monday, Wednesday, and Friday when I get home from work, around five. We can have dinner and such, and you can play with him. And if you'd like to come by during the day on the weekends, we can take him out."

It pained Ginny to say this, it pained her beyond belief to allow the man she had trusted with her heart and future access to the thing she loved most in the world, but watching how James seemed to know that Harry was more than just a stranger, she could not deprive him of that. She simply could not.

"That would be amazing, Ginny," Harry said, his voice soft. He hadn't expected to see his son even close to that much, he had expected once a week, maybe. But it seemed that Ginny was being quite generous.

"Don't mess this up, Harry," Ginny said suddenly as she began to clear the dishes. She was trying to sound firm, but he could hear the fear in her voice, the fear of him hurting their son by leaving once again and it nearly broke Harry's heart.

"I won't, Ginny. I promise."

"And I think we should set some ground rules," Ginny said, and he could practically hear the fear shift in her voice. This fear was for herself, not for her son. He nodded in agreement and allowed her to continue. "I don't want you bringing any women around him, once you've proven capable of handling him on your own." Harry attempted to interrupt, but she didn't allow him to speak. "He is _my _son, and I will not have some other woman playing house with him. He is to be kept out of the spotlight at all times. I've managed to do that for nearly two years, I'm sure you can, too."

"Absolutely," Harry said. "And the women, Ginny, that won't be a problem. Like I said last night, there hasn't been anyone since you."

Ginny looked dubious but almost hopeful when she asked, "Really?"

"I went on one date," Harry conceded. "I left within the first fifteen minutes. Her eyes weren't the right color brown, and her hair was blonde, and she didn't have freckles on her nose, and she wasn't putting me in my place with wit like yours."

Ginny closed her eyes. "Rule number three, Harry, you are not allowed to talk to me that way."

"In what way?"

"In a way that's...that's...romantic!" Ginny burst out, putting her hands on her slim hips. Harry knew he was in for it. "I've spent three years getting over you, Harry Potter, and I can't have you coming in and acting like we can make this some kind of love story. It is not a love story, we are co-parenting and that is it."

As much as her words stabbed through him, Harry nodded. "I'm sorry, Ginny, I didn't mean to come off that way."

Ginny took a deep breath and nodded. "That's all right. Just watch what you say, yeah?"

"Of course," Harry said. "May I...may I ask questions about the last couple of years?"

Ginny paused but conceded. "I suppose you'd like to fill in the blanks, so yes."

"How long after I'd gone did you find out?"

"It was about three weeks after," Ginny said, releasing James from his high chair. He reached for Harry, and she grudgingly placed him in his lap. "I was late, and I hadn't even thought about that possibility, you know? I don't think either of us did, we were so caught up in...yeah. But yes, it was about three weeks."

Harry internally cursed. Had he just held on another few weeks, he knew he would have stayed. "What made you choose to name him James Sirius?"

Ginny shrugged. "It seemed right. Besides, you're not the only one who adored Sirius. I wanted to honor him somehow. Your father and Sirius were two of the bravest and strongest men of the first war; I wanted him to have a piece of that history. And a piece of your history as well. It seemed important at the time."

"Thank you, Ginny," he said solemnly.

"Tank you?" James asked.

Ginny laughed. "Yes, James, thank you."

Harry laughed as well, realizing that his two year old son was quite like a parrot. "You gave him my last name, so I was wondering if...if people know?"

Ginny looked affronted. "Embarrassed?"

"No, no," Harry spluttered. "Security measures, you know."

Ginny sighed. "I've done a rather good job of hiding his last name from the public. People seem to believe that you left after I was pregnant with someone else's kid, despite his obvious likeness to you."

"But, you obviously corrected them," Harry said indignantly.

"I let people believe what they want to believe," Ginny shrugged. "Besides which, I knew it'd keep him safe from the lingering effects of the war."

"You're a great mother, Ginny," Harry said. Their eyes met and Ginny bit her lip before looking away.

"Thank you, Harry."

Harry said his goodbye to James shortly after that, promising to come again on Friday to see his son. He and Ginny said goodbye from a large distance apart. Ginny sighed as she shut the door behind him and clutched her son to her chest. She put him to bed.

As soon as she shut his door and returned to the kitchen to finish doing the dishes, there was a pop in her living room. Her brother stood there, looking concerned.

"How was it then?"

"It was...okay," Ginny said with a shrug. "It's hard to be around him. But James seems to have taken to him quite quickly, and Harry looks as though he's in love with the boy."

"Of course he is," Ron said, "everyone is. Our little Jay is quite the charmer."

Ginny laughed. "Unlike her uncles."

Ron laughed, not even attempting to argue. "But you're all right then?"

"Yes, Ron," Ginny said, rolling her eyes. "Thank you though, for checking."

"I want to speak to him next time he comes by."

"Well, he'll be here three or four times a week," Ginny said as she scrubbed a dish. She could practically feel Ron's eyes growing wide. "You can come by Friday night then."

"All right, then," Ron said. He gave her a quick one-armed hug. "Night, Gin."

"G'night, Ron."

When Ginny finally got to bed that night, she pondered the last fourty eight hours. She had gone three years without Harry Potter. So had her darling son. She was not about to become reliant on him, she decided. She was not going to depend on him and she would not, under any circumstances, fully trust him. Especially with her baby boy's heart. Ginny lingered on this thought as she fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Ron Weasley arrived at his sister's flat early that Friday night. He wanted to have a talk with his former best friend first thing. Ginny hadn't been the only one blind sided by Harry; he had been, too. And he was dissappointed in the man he thought he had known inside out. Ron had encouraged Ginny to send him a letter as soon as she found out, insisting that he would come home. Ginny was not so sure, and refused, saying she couldn't handle the rejection at that point. But, when he was born, and the owl had returned without the photos but also without a letter, Ron had become furious. He always assumed that Harry would come home, he would come home and make an honest woman of Ginny, and would be a wonderful father to their son. This was not so.

And Ron wanted to know why.

When there was a knock on the door, Ginny sighed from the kitchen and told him that he could answer it. She said that if they could keep their voices down, they could talk in the small living room, and that she refused to have James witness their drama.

Ron swung open the door and watched as Harry's face became slightly less nervous at the sight of Ron instead of Ginny, of all things.

"Ron," Harry said with a nod.

"I'd like a word," Ron said, keeping his tone even. He watched as Harry smiled down at James when they entered the living room.

"Hey there," Harry laughed when the baby toddled toward him at an alarming rate, crashing into his legs, which he hugged tightly. He ruffled his hair and sat, James sitting near his feet and showing Harry the teddy he had brought him days before.

"Bear," James said firmly, holding it up.

"That's right, little guy," Harry grinned. "Bear."

Ron waited for the father-son exchange to be over before speaking. "I need to know what you were thinking, Harry. To leave my sister that way. Not only my sister, really, but all of us. And to not return when you knew he was born? I never thought you would do that, Harry."

It was a testament to how much Ron had grown up in the last three years that he was not screaming with his wand in Harry's face, and for that, Harry was grateful.

"I was overcome with the guilt of it all," Harry said slowly. "I was rather convinced that all of those deaths in the War, that they were mine to shoulder, that it was my fault entirely. That night with your sister, it was the best in my life. And afterwards, I felt that I couldn't deserve that, not with so many dead. I hadn't planned on being gone long, honestly. But by the time it had been six months, I couldn't imagine returning. I didn't think I still had a place here."

"After James was born," Ron said gruffly. Harry sighed, running his hands over his hair.

"I received the pictures of him," Harry admitted. "I cried for weeks. I didn't feel, at that point, that I should be allowed to come back."

"You're right," Ron said plainly. "You didn't have a right to come back, but she still wanted you."

Harry shook his head. "I didn't deserve her."

"You didn't," Ron agreed. "And you don't deserve her now. If you've come back here to mess about with my baby sister again-"

"I haven't," Harry said, his voice firm. "I know that Ginny and I will never be together again, Ron. I accepted that the moment I left."

He heard a sniff from the kitchen as Ginny placed the food on the table. Hermione arrived with a pop, as if on cue, and stared at Harry, her expression inscrutable. Ginny called to the flat at large, "Dinner is on the table. I'll be back in a moment."

Hermione looked between Ginny and Harry before nodding at him and taking off toward Ginny's room, where the door had just slammed.

"Ma?" James asked. "Where mama go?"

"She'll be back," Harry insisted.

"Mama!" James called. "MAMA!"

Ginny appeared suddenly, shaking her red hair out of its ponytail. Harry watched it spill over her green v-neck jumper. Her eyes looked a little red. She came over and picked up James.

"Mama is right here, love," she said. She did not even glance at Harry as she moved into the kitchen. Hermione came out of the hall and shot Harry an accusatory glance.

"Ron, why don't you help your sister set the table?"

Ron nodded, stood, and gave Hermione a kiss on the cheek before going into the kitchen. Hermione took a couple of steps toward him, speaking in a low voice.

"How could you say that in her home?" Hermione hissed at him. Harry looked at her, puzzled.

"Say what?"

"Say that you knew it was over between you the moment you left!" Hermione snapped, keeping her voice at a low volume. "You never intended on returning to her, did you, Harry? I expected you to leave, to be honest, I think I was the only one who saw it coming. But I also expected you to come back for Ginny. After the conversation we had had just the day before about her-"

"I didn't mean it that way, Hermione," Harry ground out, looking angry. "I didn't expect her to ever take me back, but of course I wanted her back."

Hermione looked at him analytically for a moment before nodding sharply and turning on her heel, walking toward the kitchen. Harry sighed, running a hand over his face. He knew this had been far too easy thus far.

He sat awkwardly at the table, finding himself glad that James seemed to be impervious to the tension between the four adults at the table. Ginny refused to look at him, and he knew he needed to talk to her after dinner, if Ron and Hermione would give them enough breathing room to have a conversation.

"So James's birthday is coming up," Ginny said suddenly, breaking the silence. "In a couple of months. I was thinking that we ought to start planning the party now though."

"The Burrow as usual?" Hermione asked.

Ginny seemed to consider this. "I suppose so, he does love that pond."

At the word pond, James shrieked, "Pond, mama! Pond!"

Ginny smiled at him. "Yes, baby, pond."

Harry was aware he was an outsider in this conversation, and chose to help his son eat rather than attempt to participate. Ginny looked at him, an odd expression on her face as he spooned food into James's mouth. He attempted to smile at her, but she turned away before he could.

"How's the day care center, Gin?" Ron asked between bites. Hermione seemed to have domesticated him quite well, seeing as he swallowed before speaking.

"Pretty good," Ginny shrugged. "We've got about twenty kids there now, we might need to expand soon and hire someone to help us. James rather likes it there, don't you, buddy?"

James seemed oblivious to the matter at hand, enjoying his food too much. Ginny laughed at him and continued to talk.

"It's good for mum, you know, keeps her mind off of things."

"How's Dad doing?" Hermione asked, and Harry was startled with the name used for Arthur Weasley.

"Better," Ginny sighed, "I suppose. He's still slow and has a bit of trouble speaking."

"I'll go see him tomorrow on my lunch break," Hermione said decisively. She seemed to take a bit of pity on Harry, explaining, "Arthur had a stroke a few weeks ago."

Harry wasn't quite sure what to say. "I'm glad he's doing better."

Ron acknowledged this with a nod. Dinner was soon over, and Ron and Hermione began to clean up, as they usually did. Harry lifted James from his high chair, asking Ginny to accompany him into the living room.

"Ginny," he said. "I wanted to tell you, that what I said to Ron earlier about when I left, it came out quite wrong."

"It's fine, Harry," she said, and he could tell her defenses were up high. "I already knew all of that."

"No, you didn't," Harry said, his tone strained. "When I left, I wanted nothing more than to come back and be with you, but I didn't expect you to ever take me back."

"Well, you got one thing right then."

Harry tried to ignore the pain of those words, but it was hard. "Ginny, why let me into your life if you're going to be this way?"

"I'm not letting you into my life," Ginny said. "I'm letting you into his because you are his father, whether I like it or not."

"Well, then," Harry said, obviously deflated. "I suppose that's all I can ask for."

He said goodbye to his son and walked out the door. It wasn't until James turned to her with tears welling up in his eyes as the door slammed that Ginny felt the urge to cry.


	6. Chapter 6

"Ginny?" Harry called softly as he entered her flat one Saturday afternoon. They had agreed to take James to the magical zoo. He was rather infatuated with magical creatures. Ginny hadn't answered the door, and for once, it was unlocked. He could hear the shower running and her raspy singing voice coming from underneath the spray. He grinned. James was just waking, he could hear him babbling in his crib. Harry had learned from the past couple of weekends that James tended to babble sweetly in his crib until boredom overtook him; that's when the screaming would begin.

"Hey there, crazy boy," Harry said softly as he entered the room. James peered at him with bright green eyes, and Harry was struck again with how much he looked like both himself and Ginny.

"One night to be confused, one night to speed up truth, we had a promise paid, four hands and then away..." Ginny was singing from the shower.

"Da! G'morn Da!" James exclaimed, reaching for him. Harry paused, frozen in shock. James had called him "Da". "Da" as in, "Dad". His eyes filled with tears of joy, he couldn't help it. He had been so anxious, returning here, that James would never accept him as his father. He heard the water turn off and Ginny's singing stop, but he couldn't hold back his sniffling.

He felt a presence behind him and turned to see Ginny, wrapped only in a towel, grinning at him in her lopsided way that she did when she was being teasing.

"Look at you, crying like that! It's hard to tell who the baby in this room is!"

"He called me Da," Harry explained, beaming. Ginny couldn't help but soften her smile. Harry looked so...proud. He was practically glowing with pride. Ginny had never seen him look that way.

"Of course he did, Harry," Ginny said, attempting to keep her face as passive as possible. "You're his dad."

Harry's eyes simply filled with more tears, as it was the first time Ginny had referred to him as James's dad and not his father. It seemed silly, but the two words seemed so different, when it came down to it. He stared at her, wiping his eyes with the hand that was not balancing James on his hip. Ginny was standing there, unabashed, in a towel and nothing more, water dripped from her long hair. She was heavenly. Her legs seemed so long in that small towel. If he wasn't holding a baby, he would surely...

He shook himself. He most certainly would not do any of the things that were popping into his mind as he stared at her. She grinned at him, a teasing glimmer in her eye. _Eat your heart out, Harry, _she thought to herself yet again, smiling to herself.

"Oh please, Harry," Ginny scoffed, her voice light. "It's nothing you haven't seen before."

She left him spluttering in their son's room as she sauntered into her bedroom to continue getting ready. As soon as her door snapped shut, her jaw dropped. Why did she just do that? Was she flirting with him? No. Absolutely not. She had to watch herself from now on.

She used a drying charm on her hair before donning her well worn high waisted skinny jeans that had holes in the knees. She put on a boxy, loose T-shirt she had bought at a muggle thrift store before shoving her feet into the moccassins she had made a year ago. She hardly bothered with makeup, just a tiny bit here and there, before she went back into the living room to join Harry and James.

"I see you managed to get him dressed," Ginny said, her tone mildly impressed. She flicked her wand and began to make some tea. "Would you like some?"

"Sure," Harry said. "You know, he's got so many clothes. I had quite a hard time picking an outfit."

"Oh, I know," Ginny said with a roll of her eyes. "My mother and Hermione spoil him rotten. I can't wait until she and Ron have children, I am going to get them back tenfold."

Harry laughed. "They do seem to love James."

"He has that effect on people, I've found," Ginny said. "You should see him when we go into shops. Well, you'll see it today at the zoo."

"Zoo, Mama?"

"Yes, baby, we're going to the zoo today!" she said, and Harry watched her face brighten as she clapped to get him excited. James stood up, clapping as well.

"Dragons, mama?"

"I don't think they have any dragons, baby," Ginny laughed. "Maybe one day Uncle Charlie will take you with him."

"Unkie Charwie take me to dragon?"

"We'll see about that, love," Ginny said. "Now come here, you've got to have your breakfast. Would you mind helping him out with this, Harry?"

She placed a bowl of oatmeal with apples on the table. Harry nodded, lifting James into his high chair and beginning to spoon feed it to him.

Ginny placed a cup of tea beside Harry, made just the way he had always liked it. He smiled at her in gratitude as she picked up her own mug and stood near the stove, where she was cooking eggs.

"Have you eaten yet, Harry?"

"No," Harry said. "I don't usually eat breakfast."

Ginny tutted. "Nonsense. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

"Have you any idea how much like your mother you just sounded?" Harry laughed.

Ginny's eyes narrowed. "Hush, you."

"Hush, Da!"

"That's right, baby, you tell him," Ginny laughed. She was laughing in his presence much more often now, Harry noted. And not weak laughs either, real, hearty laughs that made his stomach swoop.

They made small talk over a small breakfast, and when it was all cleaned up, Ginny turned to James with a huge smile. "Are you ready, Jay? Time for the zoo!"

"Hippogiffs, and, and, and, umm...Phoenif and and um...Unicurns!" James exclaimed, babbling as Ginny strapped him into his stroller. Ginny and Harry exchanged a look and a laugh.

"Aren't you silly today?" Harry laughed. He followed Ginny into the living room, where she lifted an old magazine and tapped her wand to it, saying "Portus".

"He hates this," Ginny said apologetically. "But I don't trust taking him by Floo and he'd hate Apparating even more."

They each grabbed part of the magazine with one hand, another hand firmly on James's stroller. When they appeared at the entrance of the zoo, James was screaming.

"It's okay, love," Ginny said tiredly. "He does this every single time!"

"Dada doesn't like it either," Harry tried to tell James. "But see, I'm going to be brave for your mama and not cry."

James stared at him for a moment, but he seemed to understand, as his cries became quieter.

"Good work, Potter," Ginny said with a small smile as she went up to the ticket counter. Before she could reach in to her backpack, Harry had already paid. "Harry-"

"C'mon, Ginny. You know I owe you," Harry said with a furtive look. She sighed and agreed, pushing James's little buggy into the zoo. James immediately began shrieking as he looked at the unicorn exhibit. Harry could honestly say that nothing in the world made him happier than seeing James smile. James was completely untainted. He had no idea what had happened to the world to which he belonged just a year before he was born. He had no idea that his father had been gone for far too long. He had no clue that his mother had cried herself to sleep for nearly three years; and that oftentimes, she still did.

Harry looked at Ginny, who was lifting James out of his stroller so he could get a better peek at the unicorns. She was the strongest woman he knew. The strongest thing about her, he decided, was her ability to forgive. She had not forgotten, he was sure of that, but her forgiveness, and the grace and patience that she had shown him, were remarkable. She was simply remarkable. Being around her again solidified what he had already known about why he was incapable of dating while he was gone; there was no one in the world that could possibly compare to Ginny Weasley.

He wanted to tell her all of that, all of the thoughts that ran through his mind while he drank her in, everything about her. The tips of her golden red hair to the twinkle in her brown eyes as the dim sunshine hit them at the perfect angle. Her dimples when she grinned that matched those on their beautiful son's face, the beautiful son she had given him. He could never repay her for that gift.

They spent a blissful day at the zoo. Ginny snapped the first picture ever taken of Harry and James, in the Enchanted Aviary, full of beautiful magical birds. James was looking around in awe in his fathers arms, his eyes as wide as saucers. He would look at Harry, as if to make sure he was seeing the same things, and Harry was simply watching his son with a tender look that Ginny hadn't seen since...well, since he had held her and told her he loved her.

Harry's favorite part of the day, however, was when he was taking a snapshot of Ginny with James on her shoulders and a man offered to take a picture of the three of them. Harry had hoisted James off Ginny's shoulders and put him on his hip. Ginny stood beside him and she actually grinned, a real, true smile, despite the closeness between them. It was their first picture as a family. Harry couldn't wait to get a copy.

When they returned back to Ginny's flat, James was already asleep; he had even slept through the portkey.

"I can't believe he slept through that," Ginny said, hardly bothering to keep her voice down. "I'll go put him down. Would you like to say goodnight?"

Harry nodded and kissed James, who rested in Ginny's arms. He was surprised she wasn't asking him to say goodbye, just goodnight. When she returned, she flicked her wand and a couple bottles of butterbeer flew toward them. She tossed one to him and sat on the couch cross-legged.

"How's your new job?" Ginny asked, and her voice sounded genuinely curious. She never ceased to amaze him.

"It's all right," Harry said with a shrug. "They don't give me much work to do. Seems that I'm mostly there for publicity."

"Well it's good they don't," Ginny said pointedly. "The last thing I need is you running off into danger again." She seemed to catch herself. "You know, because of James."

"Right," Harry said, taking a sip of his butterbeer. "You seem to love your job."

Ginny smiled proudly. "It's my pride and joy. Mum and I started it while I was still pregnant with James."

"I heard a couple of Ministry witches talking about it the other day," Harry said, "I guess their children go there. They were quite happy with it."

Ginny's smile grew. "Oh, that must be Linda and Tracy. I'm so glad to hear that."

"You've done really well for yourself," Harry complimented, and she colored slightly.

"Thank you," she said, picking at the afghan on the couch. "It hasn't been the easiest, but I've done better than I expected to when this was all first starting."

"Ginny, I just wanted to say," Harry began, his voice shaking a little. "Thank you so much, for giving me this chance. You've been so amazingly forgiving to me, and I know I don't deserve an ounce of it, but thank you. It really means a lot to me."

Ginny looked at him with soft brown eyes and he watched her walls fall for the first time since he had returned weeks before. "Harry, what we had meant the world to me. I'm going to be honest with you about that. And nothing you could have done to me would have made me prevent you from seeing James. He's a nice reminder of how good things were, even if it was one night."

Harry swallowed to prevent himself from getting choked up. "You know I never stopped caring for you, right, Ginny?"

She stared at him for a moment. "I kept that note for a long time. The one where you told me that I must believe you would always love me. It was hard for a while, but when I had James, and he's got those eyes of yours, I couldn't help but feel that it was true." She smiled sadly. "And I know you love James, Harry. You're really brilliant with him. He adores you."

Harry smiled. "I love him very much."

Ginny took another sip of butterbeer and they fell into a comfortable silence. "I've got a question for you, Harry."

"Ask away."

"Had I sent you a letter when I first found out I was pregnant, would you have returned home? You can answer honestly."

"I probably would have," Harry said. "But I might've left again, you know. I was...I was not in a stable place, Ginny. I would have put you and James through even more hell had I been here, I truly believe that. I wasn't ready for the responsibility of caring for another person when I could hardly take care of myself. When you sent me those first pictures of him, right after he was born, I started throwing things in my trunk. I was going to rush straight home. And then I looked at the dozen empty bottles of Firewhisky and crumpled up suicide notes all over the place and I just did not believe that I could be a proper father to him. I didn't deserve him in my life. I don't deserve him in my life now, but at least I can now be a stand up guy."

Ginny blinked at him, surprised. "Suicide notes, Harry?"

"Yeah," he said slowly, rubbing the back of his neck before taking another swig of butterbeer. He continued. "I truly wanted to die, Ginny. That's what I meant when I said that that night between us kept me from doing some awful things during that time in my life. I would get the note written out, I'd have a potion all ready to go, and then I would picture that blazing look on your face when you told me you loved me, too, and you were the first person in my life to tell me that. And I just, could not do it."

Ginny stared at him, and something in her eyes shifted. Her entire perception of the events that had transpired was altered in that moment. She reached forward suddenly and grabbed his hand.

"I'm glad you couldn't do it, Harry," she said, and she sounded choked up. His skin was warm where her hand was.

"So am I, Ginny. And thank you so much, for bringing James into this world."

She smiled at him, despite the tears in her eyes. "You are quite welcome, Harry."

She moved her hand, but his skin remained warm. He wondered if she felt the same tingles he did, the familiar surge of electricity between them. As she sat back, he noticed her hand trembling, and he knew that she felt it, too.


	7. Chapter 7

A month flew by, as autumn became winter and James's December birthday approached. Harry had awkwardly attended a Weasley family dinner the week before December 12th, James's big day, with the intent of making James's birthday less uncomfortable and less tense. He was mildly successful. Ginny and Harry had developed something of a friendship, for lack of a better word, since the conversation after the zoo.

When he arrived at the Burrow, he found the Weasley clan outside in the snow, warming charms placed everywhere. James toddled toward him in the snow, wearing the cutest little snow suit.

"Bear!" James yelled, running at Harry. James was quite right. His little snow suit was designed to make him look like a small bear.

"That's right, Jamie," Harry said, lifting him up. "Bear. Happy Birthday, buddy."

Jamie locked his arms around Harry's neck. "Mama friend is scary."

Before Harry had time to ask his son what he was talking about, Hermione appeared beside him, cheeks flushed from the cold. "Hello, Harry."

Things had cleared up considerably between the three former friends. After one drunken punch from Ron at Ginny's flat, it seemed there was nothing left to fight about.

"Hey," Harry greeted. "James seems to be afraid of Ginny's friend?"

Hermione rolled her eyes with a laugh. "He's quite frightened of Luna, she's always telling him that something or other is going to eat him in his sleep."

Harry blinked, trying to decide whether to be amused or concerned, when James began to wriggle in his arms. He put him down and watched him toddle off, yelling for Ginny.

He finally set his eyes on Ginny, who looked like a little snow bunny in a white sweater and white jeans with fluffy white legwarmers. The white hat on her head added to the effect.

"Hello, Harry," she called to him from across the yard. "You're late!"

"I was putting finishing touches on his gift," Harry defended. She smiled at him and he knew she was simply teasing. It was hard to tell with the two of them. Their history left too much tension to ignore, but they tried to, for James.

"Things are getting better between you two," Hermione observed. Harry sighed.

"I suppose so, yes."

She watched him for a moment, very closely, before speaking again. "You love her, don't you?"

Harry stared at her for a moment, unsure of whether or not he should tell the truth. His shoulders slumped. "I do, yeah."

"You know, there's a reason she hasn't seen anyone since you left," Hermione said softly, bumping her shoulder into him. "And it's not all because of James."

Harry shook his head. "I think she hates me more than loves me, Hermione. She avoids eye contact and most of the time has nothing to say to me."

"She's scared of you," Hermione admitted. "And can you blame her?"

"Of course not," Harry said quickly. "You know that I understand."

"Yes, you do," Hermione said gently. "Have you two talked at all about any kind of feelings you might have for one another?"

"The first night I met James, she made it very clear that I couldn't bring up our past or speak to her in any way but platonically," Harry explained, running a hand over his hair. He watched her go down a small hill on a sled with James. She was laughing, her head thrown back as James climbed on her, giggling as well. "But then, after we took James to the zoo, we sort of talked about the circumstances. She held my hand a bit. And we've been a lot better since then."

"Well, perhaps you don't need to tell her," Hermione shrugged. "Not vocally at least."

Harry understood this hint. Just a week before, she and Ron had come to his flat to help him with James's gift. Hermione had been helping him search for something when she found his biggest secret.

"_What's this?" Hermione asked, holding up a worn box. She looked inside, trying to find the picture he was searching for. Instead, she found hundreds of letters; close to a thousand, actually. She gasped, putting a hand over her mouth. _

_Harry's mouth was dry. "They're um...they're uh, letters. To Ginny." _

"_You must have written every day you were away!" Hermione breathed. _

"_Er, yeah," Harry said tentatively. Ron clapped a hand on his shoulder, the first indication that things were truly okay between them. _

"_Good on you, mate," Ron said, continuing to look for what they had set out for to begin with. Hermione met his eyes, and Harry had to look away. He couldn't let her understand just how much he had missed Ginny, how much it had hurt to leave. It wasn't something he could talk about. She was lost to him now, and he was more than fortunate to have Ginny in his life at all. He wouldn't risk his relationship with James, he couldn't, not when he knew that it would simply end in disaster if he ever told Ginny. _

"Dada!" James cried from across the field, snapping Harry out of his memory. He was dragging Ginny by the hand toward Harry. She smiled at him, the tip of her nose a light pink. She was beautiful, he decided. Simply the most stunning creature he'd ever met.

"Hello, Ginny," Harry smiled. "Looks as though the birthday boy has you in his clutches."

"He knows I'm wrapped around those teeny fingers of his," Ginny laughed, lifting him up and giving him a mock stern look. "Don't you, my prince?"

He giggled and looked to Harry. "I Mama's prince!" he exclaimed proudly.

"Is that so?" Harry asked, smiling at Ginny. He couldn't think of a better woman to mother his child. She was perfect. She would throw herself in front of the Knight Bus for their son. She had sacrificed everything she had ever wanted for James. He wriggled down out of her arms, determined to chase Teddy Lupin.

"Be careful, Jay!" Ginny called. He ignored her. She sighed. "He's grown up so fast."

Harry felt uncomfortable, unable to agree with her statement. "He's such a great kid, Ginny. You've done a great job."

Ginny smiled. "It's funny," she said, watching her son fall in the snow and get right back up. "When I found out I was pregnant with him, I cried for all of the dreams I would never get to chase. But within hours, all of those dreams simply evolved. My dream became being the best mother I could be, it became raising a healthy baby boy the best that I could."

"Then you achieved your dream, Ginny," Harry said kindly. The smile that lit up her face at the compliment made his heart skip a beat.

"Thank you," she said softly. She bumped her hip into his, the first physical contact he had with her since the day after the zoo. He was rather certain his stomach was going to fly away, if the butterflies that had erupted inside of it were any indication. "I like to think I have."

"The life you've built for yourself is incredible, Ginny," Harry said honestly. "You've started a business and you're a fantastic mother. You're only nineteen."

"Yes, well," she said, blushing faintly. "I couldn't have done it without my family, really. I thought they were going to flip out, when I told them. But somehow, he was exactly what we all needed. He brought hope back to our home. George stopped moping so much, he was always reading about babies. And my parents finally had to take care of someone again, I think they missed that."

"I was quite surprised at how welcoming they were of me," Harry admitted. Ginny laughed and rolled her brown eyes.

"My mother will always love you like her own son, no matter what you did," Ginny said. "She's got quite the crush on you."

Harry wrinkled his nose, about to speak when James ran at them yet again. Harry swooped him up, holding him so he was like a little plank, "flying" him toward Ginny, who shrieked and giggled.

"We've got to get the snitch, James!" Harry whispered to his son.

"Mama snitch!" James said. Harry nodded.

"Go, snitch!" Harry shouted at Ginny, who took off running. He wasn't sure if she also felt the tug at her heartstrings as soon as the words left his mouth. He was taken back for an instant to sun-drenched days by the lake.

"_You know," Harry said, pulling her to him as they lay together in the shade. "You're the snitch I always wanted to catch." _

"_You're cheesy," she giggled, kissing him on the nose. "But I can't complain. Who know the Boy Who Lived would be quite so sweet? You're really a puppy, you know." _

"_If I'm your puppy, then you're my snitch." _

"_That doesn't even make sense!" she laughed. He shook his head, grinning, and kissed her. _

Hermione and Ron shared a smile as they watched the small family playing together in the snow. Their circumstances were not ideal, but the couple had decided that Harry and Ginny could make quite the family if given the chance to repair the past. Hermione pulled her camera out of her bag and snapped a few photographs.

"They're quite lovely, aren't they?" Hermione asked her fiance, who grudgingly replied with a nod.

"I suppose they are," Ron said.

"I know you don't trust him yet, Ron," Hermione said, "but you can't deny that he does love his son."

"He does," Ron admitted. They were then called over for cake, and James was situated right between his parents in front of the teddy bear cake his grandmother had baked for him. The whole group sang Happy Birthday, James clapping along as they did so. Harry and Ginny had to blow out the candles for him, and Hermione, beaming, took another photograph of the moment. James was grinning, one hand on each of his parents. He was looking between them and laughing. They were laughing as well, looking at their son and then at each other.

When they returned to Ginny's flat that night to open his presents, Harry was quite nervous. Ron and Hermione had accompanied them, sitting on the couch while he and Ginny sat with their son on the floor.

Ginny handed him gift after gift, mumbling how spoiled he would turn out. Hermione laughed, blaming Ron for the abundance of gifts the couple had given James. Finally, only Harry's was left.

"This is from your Da!" Ginny exclaimed, smiling at Harry. James slammed his hands on it excitedly before opening the present with Ginny. Inside was a red satin scrapbook, with the family photo from the zoo on the cover. Ginny glanced at Harry tentatively before opening the book.

The pages were full of pictures of both Harry and Ginny, throughout their Hogwarts years. Their years apart, and then their months together. James was thoroughly amused, screeching and pointing at them in the photos and then in person. Harry laughed at the joy of his son. Ginny looked at him questioningly.

"I thought he should have photos of us, before, ya know," Harry explained. Ginny nodded.

"It's important for him to know he came from love," Ginny said softly. Hermione stood, forcing Ron with her.

"Come on, Ron, we ought to be going."

"What-"

"Ronald, just come!"

They dissappeared with a pop. James was quite enthralled with the book, as he continued to flip through it. Ginny turned to Harry.

"That was very thoughtful of you, Harry, thank you."

"Of course. I wanted him to know his dad wasn't always such a bad guy."

"He won't even remember," Ginny said, watching her son. "He won't remember you not being around."

"But you will," Harry said, his voice rather gruff. Ginny stared at him.

"Yes, that's true."

There was a long silence until Ginny spoke again.

"Christmas is coming up soon, and he's just started to understand the concept of Santa," Ginny began. "I was thinking you might stay the night here, so you can be here Christmas morning. I would...I mean, he would, really like it if you were here."

Harry nearly fell over, he was so surprised by this invitation. "I'd love to be here, Ginny."

Ginny smiled at him, but her smile was nervous and weak. "Sounds like a plan, then."


	8. Chapter 8

After discussing with Hermione at great lengths the letters she had found, Harry had devised a plan. He had been part of James and Ginny's lives for a few months, and he couldn't shake the desire he always felt to be a real family with them. He wanted them to have a little house, with a red door, like he had promised her years ago. He supposed he had gone a bit out of order, with the baby coming first, but he was all right with that. He and Ginny had never been typical.

When he arrived at Ginny's house on Christmas Eve, he was beyond nervous. He had the box, wrapped like a present. He was going to be spending the evening in her home. Their first night like a real family. He was going to give her this box after James had fallen asleep, and hope that a god did exist and she did not slap him and kick him out.

"Hello Harry," she greeted as he entered her flat. She had given him a key a few weeks before. He could smell Christmas cookies as soon as he entered.

"It smells delicious, Ginny," he complimented. "Where's James?"

"Napping," Ginny said simply. "I set up another bed in my room. I'm sorry if that's weird for you, but we don't have a lot of room here and I don't want to blow the surprise of Santa when he's only two if I put you in the living room."

Harry gulped. "That's fine."

Ginny continued to make her cookies. "I'll also need your help wrapping the gifts. Ron's going to bring them by right after we put James down. He's reached the phase where he looks around for presents. Not that he needs anymore, when his birthday was barely two weeks ago."

"He gets spoiled for a month, that's for sure," Harry agreed, looking at the living room. Toys were scattered all around it. "Dunno how we'll even have room under that tree."

Ginny laughed. "I know, really!"

James began to cry, and Ginny was mid-icing. "Harry, can you grab him please?"

"Of course," Harry said, leaping up and going to James's room. "Good morning, sleepy head!"

"Da!" James exclaimed, reaching his chubby hands up, his cries ceasing completely. "Hi Da!"

"Hi buddy!" Harry chuckled. "Let's change you, shall we?"

"Umm..." James said, seeming to think about this prospect. "No."

Harry laughed heartily at this. "I'm afraid 'no' isn't an option, Jamie. Your mama is making Christmas cookies!"

"Kissmas cookie?" James questioned, bouncing now as Harry held him up on the changing table.

"Yes, Jay, kissmas cookies!" Harry cooed. "Aren't you just the most handsome boy?"

"Always the puppy," Ginny laughed from the kitchen. Harry's heart nearly stopped at the reference.

"Do I need to make you the snitch again?" Harry teased. James's eyes lit up.

"Mama snitch?"

"Not right now, Jamie."

James pouted for a moment but seemed to accept this as his father finished changing him and took him into the living room to play.

"He did the silliest thing," Harry said. "I asked if I could change him and he goes, 'ummm, no'. It was hilarious."

"He's developing into a little person," Ginny laughed. "Isn't that right, my little boy?"

"Ummm..." he said again. "No."

"This seems to be a new thing," Ginny said, giving Harry an amused look. He could never get enough of that twinkling, kind-hearted mischief in her eyes.

"It appears so!" he agreed, going to join James. He watched Ginny in the kitchen as she finished decorating the cookies, humming to herself as she swayed back and forth to the music softly coming out of the wireless. In her Weasley Christmas sweater and jeans, she was still stunning, even with a smudge of flour and icing on her face.

A few months ago, when he had shown up at Ginny's flat, he never thought he would end up here. He never believed that things would be all right between them, but they had reached a place where things were okay. As okay as they could be, of course. There were occassionally awkward moments. They had yet to reach a place where pain would not flash across their faces when their past was mentioned, by each other or by a friend or family member. However, they went out in public, as a family, and often were complimented. Ginny never corrected people when they referred to Harry and Ginny as a single unit. She would roll her brown eyes with a twinkling laugh and say, "It's nothing we've never been labeled before, I suppose."

"Da, Santa come bring presents?"

Harry felt his heart melt as his messy haired son crawled into his lap with wide, hopeful green eyes. "Yes, son, Santa's bringing presents tonight."

James squealed and began to clap and he heard Ginny's tinkling laugh come from the kitchen. "It's cute, you know, he thinks you hold all the answers to the world. If I give him an answer he doesn't like, he always says "ask da". It's adorable, actually."

Harry's grin grew wider at her words as James nuzzled into his arms. "It's good to know someone always thinks I'm right," he said teasingly. Ginny laughed again and he could practically hear her eyes roll from the other room.

"He'll learn one day that his mother is always right, you'll see. He just likes you better 'cause you're new!"

It still sent a small jolt through his heart whenever she said things like that, but he shook it off. He knew he was deserving of any pain that her offhanded comments might cause; and he knew that they were simply that, simply offhanded things that hardly even caused her a second thought. She would never intentionally hurt him with a snide remark; that was the beauty of Ginny, of her forgiveness and kindness and compassion. Ginny was the kind of person who would forgive you even if you hurt her a hundred times, and it sometimes occurred to Harry that he might be taking advantage of that fact, as many did. But then, she smiled at him, and he couldn't help but feel like she forgave him because she cared for him.

"I'm cooking tonight," Ginny said suddenly. "Ron and Hermione are coming, they're bringing Teddy. It should be nice for James to have someone to play with."

"Teddy won't be with his grandmother tonight?"

Ginny sighed. "She gets overwhelmed during the holidays. Ron and Hermione take him a lot."

Harry felt another stab of guilt as he thought of his godson, who he had sworn to be there for.

"They love it though," Ginny jumped in. "He loves them. They just love playing house, those two. I can't wait until they pop out a kid of their own so they stop stealing everybody else's."

"Don't be greedy now," Harry laughed. "James is communal property."

"My family seems to think so," Ginny giggled. "Anyway, the three of them should be here in a couple of hours. D'you want to just...play with James until then? I've got a lot of cooking to do."

"James seems to be entertaining himself," Harry pointed out, watching his son play with some floating Quidditch figurines. "I can help cook, if you'd like."

"Oh, I don't know about that.'

"C'mon, Ginny, I know how to cook."

"Fine," she said grudgingly. "You can make the rolls."

"Right then!" Harry said, rolling up his sleeves and rubbing his hands together. "Set me up here, Miss Weasley."

"As you wish," Ginny joked, setting his supplies in front of him. "You better not muck this up!"

"I won't, I won't!" Harry protested with a laugh. "I've only lit my place on fire once."

"How comforting," came Ginny's wry reply.

Harry set off to work, Ginny humming along to the wireless beside her as she bustled around him with ease. Harry marveled at the warm feeling in his chest as he watched her red hair sway over her white jumper as she began to lightly sing.

"What?" Ginny asked, touching her face. "Am I covered in sauce or something?"

"No, no," Harry said, blushing slightly. He continued putting the dough onto the cookie sheet.

"All right then," Ginny said slowly, turning back around to the stove.

Harry closed his eyes tightly, cursing himself for nearly slipping up before he had the chance to do it the way he had planned.

It was several hours of cooking, humming, and bantering, later that Ron, Hermione, and Teddy made their appearance. Teddy immediately crawled down from Ron's arms to play with James and his toys. The adults sat down, beginning to chat over hot chocolate as they waited for the finishing touches on dinner to be finished. Soon enough, the six sat down for a dinner, looking very much like two families enjoying a Christmas Eve supper together; Teddy had changed his hair to a deep red, imitating Ginny and Ron, to which Ginny had grinned and said "Dunno why on Earth he'd ever _choose _this cursed hair".

Dinner was over in an hour, and Ron and Harry played with the boys while Ginny and Hermione cleaned up in the kitchen. After the guests left, Ginny sighed with a small smile.

"Come on, my boy, time for bed," she said. "Santa won't come unless you get some sleep!"

"SANTA!" James shrieked at a surprising volume.

"Merlin!" Harry exclaimed. "Careful there, iron lungs. C'mon, then."

He lifted him off the carpet and followed Ginny into James's room, placing him in his crib and kissing the top of his head. "Goodnight, buddy. I'll see you in the morning."

"Daddy stay?" James questioned, looking quite puzzled as he blinked his round green eyes.

"Yes, Daddy is staying tonight," Ginny smiled softly, bending down to kiss him. "Goodnight, angel, we love you."

Harry and Ginny left his room quietly, and Ginny softly closed the door. Harry quirked an eyebrow.

"He'll sleep better that way," Ginny shrugged. "I keep it open for security purposes but with you here, there's really no point."

Harry's heart swelled with pride that she trusted him to protect her and their son. They set out putting James's gifts from Santa under the tree. He found his perfect opportunity when Ginny glanced over and said nervously, "I got you a little something, if you'd like to open it."

"Let me grab your gift," Harry smiled, running to her bedroom and grabbing it from his overnight things.

He came out and found her sitting cross-legged on the floor, a glass of butterbeer in her hand. She handed him one as well as he sat across from her next to the fire.

"You open first," Ginny said with an excited little smile as she pushed it over to him. "You know, I never expected to ever spend a Christmas with you."

"Neither did I," Harry said, his voice shaking slightly as the moment of truth approached. "But I'm really glad I am."

"Me too, Harry," she smiled.

He opened the shiny green paper to reveal a photo album. She giggled at his expression. "I got the idea from you gift to James for his birthday. There are some pictures in there that I don't think you've ever seen."

He opened it. The first page was a photo of the two of them, standing quite awkwardly and quite far apart, when she was eleven and he was twelve. It was clipped from a _Daily Prophet _article about his rescuing her, which was also attached to the other side. He grinned.

"I never saw the issue," Harry laughed. "I just remember you being red as a tomato when we took this photo."

"Oh hush!" Ginny giggled, taking a sip of her drink. "Keep looking."

He flipped through the pages, enjoying the reminiscing with Ginny, when his eyes settled on a photo of them in the common room, his head in Ginny's lap. She was running her hands through his hair, and he suddenly remembered that moment. It was just one day after the battle at Hogwarts.

_Harry came down stairs to find Ginny sitting on the couch, curled up and staring into space. He slowly approached her._

"_Hey Gin," he said, standing apart from her. She looked up at him with a tired smile. _

_"Hi love," she greeted, and she reached up to tug on him. "Come lay, you need rest." _

_"I'm okay, Gin, really." _

_"Hush," she said softly, and he grudgingly lay down, placing his head in her lap. _

"_I'm scared, Gin," he said after a moment, and his voice was choked. _

"_I know, handsome," Ginny said, her voice soothing. "But don't be. I promise you, you're safe. At least at this moment. So don't be scared." _

_And despite having watched his mentor die, and his godfather, and his mother, and having just been a part of a massive battle, he let himself be comforted by the sweet scent and soft touch of the redhead whose lap he occupied. _

"Who took this?" Harry breathed.

"Colin," Ginny smiled. "Little creep, that one was. He took a lot of the ones in there."

"Ginny, thank you," Harry said, and he fought to keep the tears of hope from springing to his eyes as he handed her his box.

Ginny excitedly tore it open, reminding him much of their son. As she lifted one eyebrow and opened the top of the box, Harry's heart stopped. What if this was a mistake? What if he shouldn't have given her these? What if it was just too much too soon? He had only been back for a couple of months.

"What on Earth.." Ginny whispered, running her hands over the tops of the envelopes. "Harry-"

"I wrote to you," Harry began, swallowing hard, "every single day since the day I left."

"I can't believe this," Ginny said, her hazel eyes wide, and slowly filling with tears.

"I'm sorry, Ginny, I didn't mean to-"

She cut him off as she flung herself at him, knocking him backward onto the carpet. His arms instinctively wrapped around her hips as her lips found his. She kissed him hard, years of pent up frustration, passion, and love burning through her very skin.

"Ginny," Harry panted. "Ginny, I've got to make sure you're not making a mistake." He sat them up, brushing her hair out of her face. "I love you, Ginny. And I don't know if you're ready for that. And I understand. I will be here, waiting, as long as I know that I stand a chance. And if I don't...I'll still be here. Loving you and loving our son."

She bit her lip and stared at her hands. "I'm not sure how I feel, Harry. Is it okay if I start reading?"

"Absolutely."

She grabbed the box and moved to the couch, patting the spot next to her encouragingly. He tentatively sat beside her as she picked up the first letter and opened it anxiously.

_My dear Ginny, _

_ It's day one. I'm miserable. I can't stop thinking of you, of your every freckle, your one dimple when you smile, your eyes and the way you would be laughing at me and teasing me if you could see what a mess I am. Because you could fix it, I think. And I hate myself for having too much pride to just ask for your help. I miss you so much all ready, knowing that I've given you up forever. It honestly gives me almost no desire to continue on. Knowing that one day, another man will be able to call you his wife. That you'll have beautiful children that will look half like you, but half like someone else that I won't recognize; because he won't be me. _

_ I promise you, Ginny, that I never meant to hurt you. And I know you, you would fire back with something like 'it hurts just the same', and you'd probably stick a wand in my face and I would love you so much for that. _

_ I would kill to be on the receiving end of your wand right now. _

_ Love, _

_ Harry _

Ginny sniffled, wiping a tear from her cheek. "Harry."

He nervously looked at her sideways. "Yeah, Gin?"

"I want to do this," she said resolutely. "We'll take it slow. Or, as slow as two people with a child can really take things."

"Nothing would make me happier."

She placed a hand on her heart. "I've spent years building up all of these walls, and in just a couple of months, you've started to knock them down. But only time can knock down the rest. I need to know that you can handle that. And I need to know that you aren't going to walk out on our son."

"I promise you, Ginny," Harry said earnestly, grabbing both of her hands. "I promise you that I am never leaving, ever again. Not you and especially not our son."

She nodded and placed a soft kiss on his cheek. "Thank you."

She stood, taking his hand and leading him down the hall to her bedroom. With one swift motion, she banished the camp bed from the corner.

"Ginny, we shouldn't."

"You really think I'm that easy?" Ginny teased, crawling into bed. "It's sleeping, Potter, and that's it if you know what's good for you."

Harry grinned and crawled in next to her, reaching slowly to put his arm over her hip. "Ginny," he whispered. "Is this happening?"

"Yes, Harry," Ginny giggled, "this is happening."

"Promise?"

"Promise."


End file.
